English Chuck Norris is ALL.

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01.11.10 07:53:57 pm
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Cold-Slice
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Here are some of my quotes of Chuck Norris, and some I found over the internet that were 10 out of 10 to me.

- When the Terminator said, "I'll be back", he went to Chuck Norris to ask for directions.

- Everybody loves Raymond, except Chuck Norris.

- The secret ingredient in Red Bull is Chuck Norris's piss.

- There was a time when Chuck Norris and Mr. T both throw'd fists at each other. This even was once called, The Big Bang.

- Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands, now it's just called the Islands.

- Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

- Chuck Norris doesn't own a computer. Everytime he sits at one, it instanly gets the BSOD(Blue Screen of Death).

- Chuck Norris doesn't wear a belt, he commands his pants to stand up.

- Once, Chuck Norris had a fever. Now we have Global Warming.

- Chuck Norris once played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun, and won.

- Chuck Norris can hear sign language.

I would post ALOT more but I want to hear you guys first.
01.11.10 08:11:25 pm
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Surplus
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When chuck norris saw you, you made this topic.
01.11.10 08:11:47 pm
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Cybernet
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@Cold-Slice:
Awesome send more i like it
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01.11.10 08:12:07 pm
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claude
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When Chuck Norris cuts an onion, that onion crys

A game containing all of Chuck Norris`s powers would have had 4000+ levels

Chuck Norris is the only person who can speak Braille

Chuck Norris doesn`t wear a watch. He decides what Time is it

Ahaha
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01.11.10 08:22:38 pm
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Surplus
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Chuck Norris Doesnt buy Cola, He gets DR.Pepper for free.
Chuck norris doesnt watch TV, he watches a plasma 99999inch DTVHD screen
When Chuck Norris doenst fight bad guys, the bad guys kill themselves.
Chuck Norris doesnt go to parties, the parties come to him.
Chuck Norris Doesnt play CS1D, cause he playes CS2D
Chuck Norris Doesnt need a compass, he decides where the north pole is.
Chuck Norris doesnt read your posts, he read my posts.
Chuck Norris isnt the god, he is ALL!
01.11.10 08:28:34 pm
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Cybernet
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tiiger87 has written:
Chuck Norris Doesnt buy Cola, He gets DR.Pepper for free.
Chuck norris doesnt watch TV, he watches a plasma 99999inch DTVHD screen
When Chuck Norris doenst fight bad guys, the bad guys kill themselves.
Chuck Norris doesnt go to parties, the parties come to him.
Chuck Norris Doesnt play CS1D, cause he playes CS2D
Chuck Norris Doesnt need a compass, he decides where the north pole is.
Chuck Norris doesnt read your posts, he read my posts.
Chuck Norris isnt the god, he is ALL!


Your wits was good except the "huck Norris Doesnt play CS1D, cause he playes CS2D ;D"

The problem is that there is no Cs1D. There is no one dimension games. I think it would sound better "Chuck Norris doesnt play css, cause he plays CS2D"


But anyway i liked it. It was funny.
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01.11.10 09:06:48 pm
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Flacko
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Chuck norris can kill two stones with one bird
01.11.10 09:28:39 pm
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Der Muggemann
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What was the first, the chicken or the egg? Of course Chuck Norris!
Staatlich geprüfter Schlagzeuger
01.11.10 09:58:32 pm
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claude
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Who was the first to step on moon`s surface? - Chuck ( he didnt even wear his space suit)

Who should be elected for the president of the US? - Chuck
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02.11.10 01:49:03 am
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CmDark
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>Rain is actually Chuck Norris pissing on us.
>Thunder is the sound of Chuck Norris taking a shit.
>The Big Bang was the result of Chuck Norris having diarrhea.
>Chuck Norris knows how to hack.. in real life.
>Chuck Norris doesn't follow rules, rules follow him.
>Chuck Norris was once an unlockable character in street fighters, but every button you pressed resulted in him doing a roundhouse kick.

•"When J. Robert Oppenheimer said "I am become death, the destroyer Of worlds", he was referring to the Chuck Norris halloween costume he was wearing."
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02.11.10 02:12:05 am
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Phenixtri
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Chuck Norris is an ACTOR ppl >> Bruce Lee all the way he was the real deal a real martial arts master. May he RIP for he was a legendary figure.

http://www.bruce-lee.com/bruce-lee-wallpapers/bruce-lee-wallpaper-3.jpg

http://www.chrismclaren.com/blog/wp-content/images/2007/08/bruce%20lee%20beats%20up%20chuck%20norris.jpg
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02.11.10 02:53:35 am
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Mawd
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Cybernet has written:
tiiger87 has written:
Chuck Norris Doesnt buy Cola, He gets DR.Pepper for free.
Chuck norris doesnt watch TV, he watches a plasma 99999inch DTVHD screen
When Chuck Norris doenst fight bad guys, the bad guys kill themselves.
Chuck Norris doesnt go to parties, the parties come to him.
Chuck Norris Doesnt play CS1D, cause he playes CS2D
Chuck Norris Doesnt need a compass, he decides where the north pole is.
Chuck Norris doesnt read your posts, he read my posts.
Chuck Norris isnt the god, he is ALL!


Your wits was good except the "huck Norris Doesnt play CS1D, cause he playes CS2D ;D"

The problem is that there is no Cs1D. There is no one dimension games. I think it would sound better "Chuck Norris doesnt play css, cause he plays CS2D"


But anyway i liked it. It was funny.


chuck norris doesnt need to play computer games cuz he can play games in his mind
WIPs : • Lost Souls •
02.11.10 03:46:42 am
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Indiana266
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Phenixtri has written:
Chuck Norris is an ACTOR ppl >> Bruce Lee all the way he was the real deal a real martial arts master. May he RIP for he was a legendary figure.

This thread is about Chuck Norris jokes, not who is better.

The initials for the deadliest poison in the world is CN, coincedence I think not.
A couple weeks ago I was driving by a quick lube, the sign on the front said "Faster than Chuck Norris."
Then there was a quaking and the quick lube was no more. lol

Chuck Norris can push your buttons.
Listen, hear anything? I don't.
02.11.10 05:11:33 am
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Phenixtri
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In that case the title fails .. badly thread should be titled Chuck Norris jokes not Chuck Norris is ALL >> its kinda misleading
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03.11.10 06:13:41 pm
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The Camo
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Cold-Slice has written:
Chuck Norris Doesnt play CS1D, cause he playes CS2D


Better, Chuck Norris plays CS2D in 3D
03.11.10 10:38:44 pm
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0a
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The Camo has written:
Cold-Slice has written:
Chuck Norris Doesnt play CS1D, cause he playes CS2D


Better, Chuck Norris plays CS2D in 3D

no, it plays CS2D in iPhone LOL
(iChuck Norris)
03.11.10 10:57:08 pm
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J4x
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lol, im geting tired of chuck norris....
03.11.10 11:11:27 pm
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Yorty
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These aren't any funny. Do you have any idea how repetitive and annoying chuck norris jokes have become? I hate seeing these threads pop up.
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"Give a small boy a hammer, and he will find that everything he encounters needs pounding."
03.11.10 11:28:49 pm
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Crazyx
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
04.11.10 12:52:53 am
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TDShuft
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Chuck norris dont read the book , the book read his self for chuck norris
Sorry , I can't be Perfect !
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